Baro mashe tero parban (In twelve months, thirteen festivals). That’s the specialty of Bengal. There’s always an occasion to celebrate. After Kali Puja and Diwali, brothers and sisters of Bengal gets ready to celebrate Bhai Phota (Brother’s Day).

Bhai Phota — the perfect way to show your brother that you care. Sisters start the day on a fresh note by praying to Jom (the God of Death), Jamuna (Jom’s sister), Chitragupta (the accountant of human sins and virtues) and Jom Dut (Jom’s messenger). Sisters pray for their brother’s safety, success and well being.

Two days after Kali puja, on dvitiya (second day), Bhai Phota is celebrated. On this day, sisters keep a fast and invite their brothers to be felicitated. This event is ceremoniously performed by the loving sister who religiously fasts the whole morning until she applies a Phota (tilak) of chandan (sandal wood) paste, kaajol and doi (yogurt) on her brother's forehead, wishing him a long life and offering him sweets and gifts. The sisters make their brothers sit on an Asana (a small cotton mattress) and draws the Phota on the forehead of the brother. If the sister is elder then she blesses her brother with rice grains and Durba (blades of grass) when the brother touches her feet. It is customary on the part of the sister if she is elder, to draw the Phota with the little finger of the left hand and with that of the right hand if she is younger from her brother. The brother also eagerly waits for his sister to apply the Phota and in turn lavishes her with love and gifts, which marks the immense love and affection between the brother and sister. After this the brothers are served sweets and then the whole family engages into singing songs, play games and anything that is enjoyed by all. On this day relatives are invited to the house for lunch or dinner and thus a huge gathering of young children, teenagers and adults make the ambience more festive and cheerful. The sisters, dressed in their best, makes the arrangement for the Phota.

Bhai Phota is like a sequel to Raksha Bandhan, a day sisters look forward to. One of the earliest recollections that comes to an elder sister when thinking about her brother is the childhood days of Bhai Phota, the last spree before school reopens the next day, after a month long festivity starting with Mahalaya. During childhood, sisters dress up in a sari on Bhai Phota. Brothers would be in brand new pajama panjabi (kurta pajama). Brotherhood or sisterhood is a part of everyday ‘taken for granted’ life, and yet this occasion catches fiery imagination like nothing else. Going down the memory lane one recollects the early morning of picking durba (the first blades of grass) and the hands turning moist with the sisir (heavy dewdrops) of late autumn. In the backdrop of a conservative Hindu society, the fact remains that this is perhaps the relation most widely celebrated.

Bhai Phota is special to all bengalis. The phota is more than a mere token from a sister, there’s much more to it. It is a very endearing, informal occasion - deeply rooted in religion. Through the hymns sisters tell their brothers how much they mean to them, and that they would never like to let go of them. The sister gives phota to the forehead of her brother thrice with either of the three the hymns:

While this day brings so much of happiness and joy to the sisters and brothers who are together, it is equally painful for those who are away from each other. Sometimes brothers stay so far, may be even abroad that they are unable to be on the side of their loving sisters on this day. They cherish the sweet memories of the past and hope that the following year they will be with their sisters to take the Phota.